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Monday, September 29, 2008

Top Ten Features Of The Rejected $700 Billion Bailout
 Top Ten   
First 500 billion comes from Regis
If this bailout fails, promise of another $700 billion bailout to bailout the bailout
To give Americans a break, this week gas is being lowered to 9 bucks a gallon
For $20 you can bail yourself out with the hilarious Late Show Fun Facts book available now!
A billion dollars to rebuild the Mets bullpen
Instead of securities, they're now called "insecurities." Hey, you've been great. Enjoy Richard Lewis
For some reason, Haliburton gets $500 billion
No number 3 -- economy so bad writer sold computer
Everything west of the Mississippi will be sold to China
President Bush must send every American a "Sorry I'm a dumbass" card
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For a million-dollar donation to the government, you can have one night of passion with Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson

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Issued in 700 billion annual installments of $1

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During negotiations, President Bush watched entire "American Chopper" marathon

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Everyone in country gets free small order of flaming buffalo wing bites at the Olive Garden

Kate Winslet's Cooking Injuries
With an average two wounds per meal, does Kate Winslet belong in the kitchen?
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Top Ten Things Overheard At The Presidents' Lunch
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Glasvegas
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January 7, 2009
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