DAVETV If you could look at only one thing on the Internet, DaveTV would be the obvious choice. What other so-called "website" lets you watch LATE SHOW Highlights, Comedy Clips, Slideshows, Stupid Trick clips and The Tony Mendez Show?
TOP TEN LIST You know it, you love it, you can't live without it: the revolutionary comedy bit that won Dave the Nobel Peace Prize. Check out the latest Top Ten List here.
TOP TEN ARCHIVES Old Top Ten Lists never die, they just get archived. The Top Ten Archives is searchable by date and keyword. Also, please note that the word "archives" contains the word "chives."
TOP TEN CONTEST So you think you're as funny as Dave's writers? Or maybe you just enjoy wasting time at work? See if you've got the chops to win a great prize in our weekly Top Ten Contest.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
TOP TEN SEARCH Search Results.
WAHOO GAZETTE LATE SHOW staffer Mike McIntee gives you a daily show summary and the behind-the-scenes lowdown with his daily Wahoo Gazette. So much juicy inside information that you'll say "Wahoo!"
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
THE WAHOO GAZETTE ARCHIVE Mike McIntee's popular Wahoo Gazette is archived here in the aptly- named Wahoo Gazette Archive. You can search by date, keyword, or show number, or even Dave's tie pattern (coming June 2012).
Donald Trump; and Jon Heder.
PLUS: Slow Motion Replay of the Night; A Message From Al Gore; Late Show Fun Facts; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; a Top Ten List; and Alan Kalter Makes Your Product Sound Sexy.
“. . . and now, friend of Big Tobacco, David Letterman!” ACT 1:
Dave, a big fan of surfing the ‘net, read in one of those computer magazines that the website with the most hits is . . . . . the hundreds of porn sites. #2 is a website about Arizona highways. And what is #3? It’s The Tony Mendez Show! That’s right, in the magazine Dave was reading, “The Tony Mendez Show” was said to be the #3 website in the whole wide world. Hmmm, I wonder what the name of this magazine is . . . “TONY”?
SLOW MOTION REPLAY OF THE NIGHT: From last week’s “Meet the Press”, former Jersey U.S. Senator Bill Bradley jiggles his jowls. Looks like Dollar Bill is suffering inflation.
A MESSAGE FROM AL GORE: “As I said earlier, I think the proof is going to be in the pudding. / I sure like / pudding.”
LATE SHOW FUN FACTS – Before beginning with the Fun Facts, Dave reads from a card he received from the FBMI, the Federal Bureau of Miscellaneous Information.
“WE’VE MOVED!
Please note that as of March 26th, 2007, the FBMI is located at:
830 E Street NW
Suite 600
Washington, D.C. 20463
(across from the National Institute Center)
We hope you’ll visit us at our new offices.”
- The music for “The Star Spangled Banner” comes from a British drinking song
- A lion’s roar can be heard more than five miles
- Detroit, Michigan has more registered bowlers than any other city in the United States
- General Tso was allergic to chicken
- Bruce Springsteen’s “Born In The USA” album featured a warning for fans to be careful when dancing in the dark.
- The cheetah holds the title of “Fastest Land Animal” and in 1983 it also won “Most Improved.”
- The largest rat ever killed by a New York City exterminator measured five feet long without a tail
- If you say ‘Have a nice day’ to someone after 5 PM, it refers to the next day.
- Since 1988, a Frisbee has been stuck on the top of Washington Monument
- For best results, pokes holes in plastic wrap before cooking
- Scientists predict that in late 2007 the show “Mythbusters” will run out of myths.
- To avoid an interruption in delivery of your fun facts, renew your subscription today
- In 1981, the Kennedy Center honored Loni Anderson for her role in “WKRP in Cincinnati”
- One-third of explorers who’ve visited both the North and South Poles developed bipolar disorder
- In the 1950s, Philip Morris spent millions of dollars trying to teach dogs to smoke
- “Rick on the car phone, you’re next on ‘Mike and the Mad Dog.’”
- 40% of people who believe the moon landing was faked also believe the moon is fake
- Are historians believe the Mona Lisa is smiling because Leonardo Da Vinci ws telling the model “Yo Mama’s So Fat” jokes
- The lady’s stacked and that’s a fact, ain’t holding nothing back. She’s a brick house.”
- Nine out of ten visits to Delaware are the result of a wrong turn
- Dial-A-Mattress cannot guarantee you the best price unless you leave off the last ‘S’ for savings.
- During the early 70s, McDonalds briefly offered customers a choice of French fries or consommé
- In addition to x-ray vision, Superman could also guess your weight within 5 pounds.
Some of the above may have been lost in editing. And Dave skipped some during the taping which you may not have seen. But you can read those skipped right here.
- The Count of Monte Cristo died from cardiac arrest after eating too many Monte Cristo sandwiches
- Because the Japanese language has several thousand characters, each episode of Japan’s ‘Wheel of Fortune’ can last several days
- In 1965, a Milwaukee sound technician copyrighted the phrase, “Testing, one, two.”
GREAT MOMENTS IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES: We see FDR. We see JFK. We see George W. Bush: “I’d like to spend a little time on education. I . . . . . uhhh . . . . uhhhh . . . . . . uhhhh.”
ACT 2:
It’s time for a segment that we like to call, “ALAN KALTER MAKES YOUR PRODUCT SOUND SEXY": Alan: “Thanks, Dave. Hi, I’m Alan Kalter, TV’s Sergeant Pinkus. You know, ladies always ask me, ‘Big Red, how do you keep your lawn so gorgeous?’ First I say, ‘I have a good mower.’ But then I show them my electric trimmer: the Black & Decker Grasshog.”
Alan turns to another camera; lights dim; sexy sax music is heard. Alan holds and strokes the Grasshog seductively.
“Its exclusive Automatic Feed Spool system used centrifugal force to advance the cutting string --- you like a little centrifugal force, don’t you? I thought so. The cutting head swivels from trimmer to edger at the touch of a button, for those of you who like to try different positions. Ladies, you’ll appreciate the telescoping shaft. The Grasshog is powered by an 18-volt battery, and when it’s charged, it’s ready to go all night looonnnng. > Mmmmmm.” FREEZE FRAME Announce: “If you’d like Alan Kalter to make your product sound sexy, send a sample to:
Alan Kalter Makes Your Product Sound Sexy
1697 Broadway
New York, New York 10019
Back to you, Dave.”
TOP TEN: FEATURES ON THE ONE MILLION DOLLAR LAPTOP – A London-based luxury company is about to unveil its new laptop with a price tag of $1 million. It can be purchased “by appointment only.” Dave adds, “And it comes with a hat that reads across the front, “dumbass.” #4. Documentation that explains what the “Scroll Lock” key actually does --- Am I right, people? Let me hear you! ACT 3-4: DONALD TRUMP: The new Miss USA 2007 was tiara-ed just the other day, a Donald Trump beauty pageant. Says the Donald, “It’s the only time I’ve ever made money on beautiful women.” Beautiful women usually end up costing Donald millions.
Dave asks if Donald has heard from his pal Regis and Donald reports that Regis is doing great. I smiled, recalling that Regis and the Donald sat together directly behind home plate during a Yankee World Series. You couldn’t miss them. But it’s good to hear Regis is recovering nicely. And how is Donald’s health? Does he ever worry about his health? Donald sighs and says he practices “Out of sigh, out of mind.” He really doesn’t think about it. He allows himself a physical checkup once a year. Dave says he knows Donald’s doctor. Says Dave, “He’s the best ears, nose, and wallet guy in the business.”
Heck, I think that joke is as old as Donald and Dave.
How is the Rosie thing going? The big brew-ha-ha started up over the Miss USA Tara Conner story when Mr. Trump decided to forgive her for her transgressions and to give her a 2nd chance. Rosie didn’t like how the whole thing smelled. Things got ugly with a lot of insults hurled back and forth. Things got awkward and stressed between the two, but for the observer, it was great fun for the whole family. And then Barbara Walters got involved. Dave says rumor has it that Rosie broke a beer bottle and attacked Barbara and Barbara had to grab a chair to defend herself. And then Barbara came out to defend her co-host, Rosie. Barbara and Donald have been friends for years and this put a strain on the relationship but upon looking back, Donald says he can understand why she came to Rosie’s defense but still, things aren’t quite the same between them.
Donald’s “The Apprentice” continues to do well and can be seen on another network, Sunday nights at 10:00. The season finale is April 22nd.
By the way, the other network is NBC.
ACT 5:
“And now, a Late Show Announcement! Daylight Savings Time begins this weekend. Don’t forget to set your clocks ahead one hour!
This has been a Late Show Announcement.”
ACT 6 WILL IT FLOAT: Alan Kalter is portrayed by Commissioner Rizzo.
Tonight’s item: a paper shredder.
Dave says it will sink.
Paul says it will sink.
Dave changes his call to “Float.”
President Bush says it will not float.
We are ready to play. The models drop the paper shredder into the "Will It Float?" tank and it . . . . floats. Ta da! Dave is right. Paul and the President are wrong.
Paul plays the "Will It Float?" closing theme . . . but then stops suddenly in the middle to exclaim, “It sunk! It sunk!” We go back to the "Will It Float?" tank and find that the paper shredder did indeed sink. So Paul and the President are right.
Afterwards, I talked to the President and he explained to me that much like tonight’s "Will It Float?" where many thought he was originally wrong, the same will hold true with the “surge” in Iraq. I’m not sure it that’ll float.
CLOSE JON HEDER: How long will it be before he’s no longer, “Jon Heder, you know, Napoleon Dynamite”? He’s in high demand on the college circuit. He’d travel all over the country, do a 10-minute intro of himself, and spend the rest of the night doing a Q&A. Mostly, the Q&A is nothing more than requests, such as “Can you say ‘Gosh’?” and “Do the dance. Do the dance!” One guy asked if Jon would throw a steak at his face. Jon would point out that it wasn’t his character that threw the steak in the movie, but that didn’t matter to the requester. Jon eventually agreed once he considered, “When will I ever get the chance to throw a steak at a guy’s face again?” You can’t turn something like that down.
Jon grew up in Oregon and came from a big scouting family. Jon has 4 brothers, one of them his identical twin. Dave wondered how was the show supposed to know if we had the real Jon Heder or his identical twin? I guess it’s something we will never really know. Jon’s dad is a doctor and was also the scoutmaster. For his dad, the ultimate scout badge to earn was the First Aid Badge. Jon remembers going out on a 3-day hike and one of the kids slipped and a huge stick went into his arm like a syringe. While all the kids went bug-eyed, Jon’s dad calmly took the incident and made it into a learning tool. He said in a normal tone, “OK, kids, what you’re seeing here are the initial stages of shock . . .” Everyone was just about sick from the sight.
Jon stars in the film Blades of Glory with Will Ferrell. Did Jon do his own skating or did he have a stunt-double. Jon proudly says he did a lot of his own skating, and then upped it, “More than you think!” Is this true? I don’t know, but I do know an actor can pretty much say whatever he wants. Why not say you did most of your own skating? Who’s it gonna hurt? Blades of Glory is in theaters now. It looks to be a silly movie with lots of laughs, and isn’t that what a comedy is supposed to be?
And that was our show for Friday March 30, 2007.
The Donald J. Trump Signature Collection:
Men's suits
Neckwear
Shirts
Cuff links
Leather goods
Eyeglasses
Sportswear
Watches
Something is not right with today’s Spring Break. I went to Daytona in 1979 on $200. Four of us drove down from upstate New York. Loads of college classmates went down on 3 busses. And there were some who flew; but only a few. And nothing seemed planned. Everything was simply “go as you went along.” Today, everything seems orchestrated, everything is sponsored, everything is for show. At least that’s what it looks on the TV. And I imagine if your Spring Break doesn’t measure up to what you see on MTV, you’ll be disappointed. Personally, it looks too crowded for me with lots of waiting around for something to happen. And can’t anybody just drink a beer any more? Or does every intake of alcohol have to be coupled with a gimmick, like drinking through a hose or something. Stop the show and just enjoy yourselves. Once you feel pressure to have a good time, the chance of your having a good time vanishes.
One way I like to have a good time is sitting back relaxed and watching others work so hard to have a good time.
Trump Books:
"Trump: The Art of the Deal"
"Trump: The Art of Survival"
"Trump: The Art of the Comeback"
"Trump: Surviving at the Top"
"Trump: How to Get Rich"
"Trump: Think Like a Millionaire"
"Trump: The Best Golf Advice"
Hey, a Wahoo reader sent in a new game to play. Yesterday I wrote how I like to listen to Imus in the Morning to see how long it takes for him to say the word, “hideous.” And then I wait to see how long it takes for one from his team to fake a stutter in disbelief, such as “Wha wha wha wha what are you talking about?” It’s Imus’s line they’ve all unconsciously borrowed. Wahoo reader Don Smith writes that his wife likes to watch and listen to Lou Dobbs on the CNN. She likes to count how many times he says, “point of fact” and “illegal aliens” every night.
Sounds like it has the makings of a good drinking game.
I’m surprised none of the local sports scribes have mentioned this, or if they have, I’ve missed it. In the off-season, the Yankees picked up light-hitting 1st baseman Doug Mientkiewicz. Why? Well, he’s an excellent fielding first baseman, but I suspect they got him because he played on the same high school team as Alex Rodriguez. The Yankees want A-Rod to have a friend nearby in order to make him more comfortable in New York.
I don’t know if this was what the Yankees were thinking or if this will help, but I do have a degree in psychology.
Hotel and Commercial Office Real Estate:
Trump Towers (New York, New Jersey, Chicago, Florida,
Las Vegas, Seoul, Toronto)
Trump Hotels (Las Vegas, New York, Chicago, Toronto,
Panama, Canouan Island)
Trump Casino Resorts:
Trump Taj Mahal (Atlantic City)
Trump Plaza (Atlantic City)
Trump Marina (Atlantic City)
Club Trump Privee (Canouan Island)
And now, a Wahoo Gazette tradition: (Is it a tradition when it’s only the second year?)
In Like A Lion, Out Like A Lamb
by Lorie Hill
March roars in like a lion
So fierce,
The wind so cold,
It seems to pierce.
The month rolls on
And Spring draws near,
And March goes out
Like a lamb so dear.
Next Week’s Previously Viewed Programs: MONDAY:From February 26, 2007; #2713: Stupid Human Tricks; Jake Gyllenhaal; and Brand New. TUESDAY:From February 15, 2007; #2706: Sienna Miller; Nas; and ventriloquist Jim Barber & Seville WEDNESDAY:From March 19, 2007; #2721: Bernie Mac; Paula Abdul; and Joss Stone. THURSDAY:From February 21, 2007; #2710: John Travolta; Eric Nerhus; and “Spring Awakening” FRIDAY:From March 14, 2007; #2720: Richard Gere; Gene Rurka; and Aqualung.
Other Trump Brands:
"The Apprentice"
Trumped! (radio program)
Trump Pageants (including the Miss USA, Miss Teen USA,
and Miss Universe Pageants)
Donald Trump: The Fragrance
Trump Ice (bottled water)
Trump Super Premium Line of Vodka
Trump University (includes Trump University clothing,
software, and CDs)
Trump Mortgage
Trump Magazine
Trump Golf Clubs
Go Trump (online travel Web site)
Trump Model Management
Disposable cameras
Trump furniture line (coming 2007)
Skating rinks
And so ends another issue of the Wahoo Gazette, the world’s longest continuous-running blog on the internet . . . . I think.
CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From New City, New York and a 1976 graduate of Ramapo High School, it’s Joanne Sullivan!
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
Donald Trump; and Jon Heder.
PLUS: Slow Motion Replay of the Night; A Message From Al Gore; Late Show Fun Facts; Great Moments in Presidential Speeches; a Top Ten List; and Alan Kalter Makes Your Product Sound Sexy.
“. . . and now, friend of Big Tobacco, David Letterman!” ACT 1:
Dave, a big fan of surfing the ‘net, read in one of those computer magazines that the website with the most hits is . . . . . the hundreds of porn sites. #2 is a website about Arizona highways. And what is #3? It’s The Tony Mendez Show! That’s right, in the magazine Dave was reading, “The Tony Mendez Show” was said to be the #3 website in the whole wide world. Hmmm, I wonder what the name of this magazine is . . . “TONY”?
SLOW MOTION REPLAY OF THE NIGHT: From last week’s “Meet the Press”, former Jersey U.S. Senator Bill Bradley jiggles his jowls. Looks like Dollar Bill is suffering inflation.
A MESSAGE FROM AL GORE: “As I said earlier, I think the proof is going to be in the pudding. / I sure like / pudding.”
LATE SHOW FUN FACTS – Before beginning with the Fun Facts, Dave reads from a card he received from the FBMI, the Federal Bureau of Miscellaneous Information.
“WE’VE MOVED!
Please note that as of March 26th, 2007, the FBMI is located at:
830 E Street NW
Suite 600
Washington, D.C. 20463
(across from the National Institute Center)
We hope you’ll visit us at our new offices.”
- The music for “The Star Spangled Banner” comes from a British drinking song
- A lion’s roar can be heard more than five miles
- Detroit, Michigan has more registered bowlers than any other city in the United States
- General Tso was allergic to chicken
- Bruce Springsteen’s “Born In The USA” album featured a warning for fans to be careful when dancing in the dark.
- The cheetah holds the title of “Fastest Land Animal” and in 1983 it also won “Most Improved.”
- The largest rat ever killed by a New York City exterminator measured five feet long without a tail
- If you say ‘Have a nice day’ to someone after 5 PM, it refers to the next day.
- Since 1988, a Frisbee has been stuck on the top of Washington Monument
- For best results, pokes holes in plastic wrap before cooking
- Scientists predict that in late 2007 the show “Mythbusters” will run out of myths.
- To avoid an interruption in delivery of your fun facts, renew your subscription today
- In 1981, the Kennedy Center honored Loni Anderson for her role in “WKRP in Cincinnati”
- One-third of explorers who’ve visited both the North and South Poles developed bipolar disorder
- In the 1950s, Philip Morris spent millions of dollars trying to teach dogs to smoke
- “Rick on the car phone, you’re next on ‘Mike and the Mad Dog.’”
- 40% of people who believe the moon landing was faked also believe the moon is fake
- Are historians believe the Mona Lisa is smiling because Leonardo Da Vinci ws telling the model “Yo Mama’s So Fat” jokes
- The lady’s stacked and that’s a fact, ain’t holding nothing back. She’s a brick house.”
- Nine out of ten visits to Delaware are the result of a wrong turn
- Dial-A-Mattress cannot guarantee you the best price unless you leave off the last ‘S’ for savings.
- During the early 70s, McDonalds briefly offered customers a choice of French fries or consommé
- In addition to x-ray vision, Superman could also guess your weight within 5 pounds.
Some of the above may have been lost in editing. And Dave skipped some during the taping which you may not have seen. But you can read those skipped right here.
- The Count of Monte Cristo died from cardiac arrest after eating too many Monte Cristo sandwiches
- Because the Japanese language has several thousand characters, each episode of Japan’s ‘Wheel of Fortune’ can last several days
- In 1965, a Milwaukee sound technician copyrighted the phrase, “Testing, one, two.”
GREAT MOMENTS IN PRESIDENTIAL SPEECHES: We see FDR. We see JFK. We see George W. Bush: “I’d like to spend a little time on education. I . . . . . uhhh . . . . uhhhh . . . . . . uhhhh.”
ACT 2:
It’s time for a segment that we like to call, “ALAN KALTER MAKES YOUR PRODUCT SOUND SEXY": Alan: “Thanks, Dave. Hi, I’m Alan Kalter, TV’s Sergeant Pinkus. You know, ladies always ask me, ‘Big Red, how do you keep your lawn so gorgeous?’ First I say, ‘I have a good mower.’ But then I show them my electric trimmer: the Black & Decker Grasshog.”
Alan turns to another camera; lights dim; sexy sax music is heard. Alan holds and strokes the Grasshog seductively.
“Its exclusive Automatic Feed Spool system used centrifugal force to advance the cutting string --- you like a little centrifugal force, don’t you? I thought so. The cutting head swivels from trimmer to edger at the touch of a button, for those of you who like to try different positions. Ladies, you’ll appreciate the telescoping shaft. The Grasshog is powered by an 18-volt battery, and when it’s charged, it’s ready to go all night looonnnng. > Mmmmmm.” FREEZE FRAME Announce: “If you’d like Alan Kalter to make your product sound sexy, send a sample to:
Alan Kalter Makes Your Product Sound Sexy
1697 Broadway
New York, New York 10019
Back to you, Dave.”
TOP TEN: FEATURES ON THE ONE MILLION DOLLAR LAPTOP – A London-based luxury company is about to unveil its new laptop with a price tag of $1 million. It can be purchased “by appointment only.” Dave adds, “And it comes with a hat that reads across the front, “dumbass.” #4. Documentation that explains what the “Scroll Lock” key actually does --- Am I right, people? Let me hear you! ACT 3-4: DONALD TRUMP: The new Miss USA 2007 was tiara-ed just the other day, a Donald Trump beauty pageant. Says the Donald, “It’s the only time I’ve ever made money on beautiful women.” Beautiful women usually end up costing Donald millions.
Dave asks if Donald has heard from his pal Regis and Donald reports that Regis is doing great. I smiled, recalling that Regis and the Donald sat together directly behind home plate during a Yankee World Series. You couldn’t miss them. But it’s good to hear Regis is recovering nicely. And how is Donald’s health? Does he ever worry about his health? Donald sighs and says he practices “Out of sigh, out of mind.” He really doesn’t think about it. He allows himself a physical checkup once a year. Dave says he knows Donald’s doctor. Says Dave, “He’s the best ears, nose, and wallet guy in the business.”
Heck, I think that joke is as old as Donald and Dave.
How is the Rosie thing going? The big brew-ha-ha started up over the Miss USA Tara Conner story when Mr. Trump decided to forgive her for her transgressions and to give her a 2nd chance. Rosie didn’t like how the whole thing smelled. Things got ugly with a lot of insults hurled back and forth. Things got awkward and stressed between the two, but for the observer, it was great fun for the whole family. And then Barbara Walters got involved. Dave says rumor has it that Rosie broke a beer bottle and attacked Barbara and Barbara had to grab a chair to defend herself. And then Barbara came out to defend her co-host, Rosie. Barbara and Donald have been friends for years and this put a strain on the relationship but upon looking back, Donald says he can understand why she came to Rosie’s defense but still, things aren’t quite the same between them.
Donald’s “The Apprentice” continues to do well and can be seen on another network, Sunday nights at 10:00. The season finale is April 22nd.
By the way, the other network is NBC.
ACT 5:
“And now, a Late Show Announcement! Daylight Savings Time begins this weekend. Don’t forget to set your clocks ahead one hour!
This has been a Late Show Announcement.”
ACT 6 WILL IT FLOAT: Alan Kalter is portrayed by Commissioner Rizzo.
Tonight’s item: a paper shredder.
Dave says it will sink.
Paul says it will sink.
Dave changes his call to “Float.”
President Bush says it will not float.
We are ready to play. The models drop the paper shredder into the "Will It Float?" tank and it . . . . floats. Ta da! Dave is right. Paul and the President are wrong.
Paul plays the "Will It Float?" closing theme . . . but then stops suddenly in the middle to exclaim, “It sunk! It sunk!” We go back to the "Will It Float?" tank and find that the paper shredder did indeed sink. So Paul and the President are right.
Afterwards, I talked to the President and he explained to me that much like tonight’s "Will It Float?" where many thought he was originally wrong, the same will hold true with the “surge” in Iraq. I’m not sure it that’ll float.
CLOSE JON HEDER: How long will it be before he’s no longer, “Jon Heder, you know, Napoleon Dynamite”? He’s in high demand on the college circuit. He’d travel all over the country, do a 10-minute intro of himself, and spend the rest of the night doing a Q&A. Mostly, the Q&A is nothing more than requests, such as “Can you say ‘Gosh’?” and “Do the dance. Do the dance!” One guy asked if Jon would throw a steak at his face. Jon would point out that it wasn’t his character that threw the steak in the movie, but that didn’t matter to the requester. Jon eventually agreed once he considered, “When will I ever get the chance to throw a steak at a guy’s face again?” You can’t turn something like that down.
Jon grew up in Oregon and came from a big scouting family. Jon has 4 brothers, one of them his identical twin. Dave wondered how was the show supposed to know if we had the real Jon Heder or his identical twin? I guess it’s something we will never really know. Jon’s dad is a doctor and was also the scoutmaster. For his dad, the ultimate scout badge to earn was the First Aid Badge. Jon remembers going out on a 3-day hike and one of the kids slipped and a huge stick went into his arm like a syringe. While all the kids went bug-eyed, Jon’s dad calmly took the incident and made it into a learning tool. He said in a normal tone, “OK, kids, what you’re seeing here are the initial stages of shock . . .” Everyone was just about sick from the sight.
Jon stars in the film Blades of Glory with Will Ferrell. Did Jon do his own skating or did he have a stunt-double. Jon proudly says he did a lot of his own skating, and then upped it, “More than you think!” Is this true? I don’t know, but I do know an actor can pretty much say whatever he wants. Why not say you did most of your own skating? Who’s it gonna hurt? Blades of Glory is in theaters now. It looks to be a silly movie with lots of laughs, and isn’t that what a comedy is supposed to be?
And that was our show for Friday March 30, 2007.
The Donald J. Trump Signature Collection:
Men's suits
Neckwear
Shirts
Cuff links
Leather goods
Eyeglasses
Sportswear
Watches
Something is not right with today’s Spring Break. I went to Daytona in 1979 on $200. Four of us drove down from upstate New York. Loads of college classmates went down on 3 busses. And there were some who flew; but only a few. And nothing seemed planned. Everything was simply “go as you went along.” Today, everything seems orchestrated, everything is sponsored, everything is for show. At least that’s what it looks on the TV. And I imagine if your Spring Break doesn’t measure up to what you see on MTV, you’ll be disappointed. Personally, it looks too crowded for me with lots of waiting around for something to happen. And can’t anybody just drink a beer any more? Or does every intake of alcohol have to be coupled with a gimmick, like drinking through a hose or something. Stop the show and just enjoy yourselves. Once you feel pressure to have a good time, the chance of your having a good time vanishes.
One way I like to have a good time is sitting back relaxed and watching others work so hard to have a good time.
Trump Books:
"Trump: The Art of the Deal"
"Trump: The Art of Survival"
"Trump: The Art of the Comeback"
"Trump: Surviving at the Top"
"Trump: How to Get Rich"
"Trump: Think Like a Millionaire"
"Trump: The Best Golf Advice"
Hey, a Wahoo reader sent in a new game to play. Yesterday I wrote how I like to listen to Imus in the Morning to see how long it takes for him to say the word, “hideous.” And then I wait to see how long it takes for one from his team to fake a stutter in disbelief, such as “Wha wha wha wha what are you talking about?” It’s Imus’s line they’ve all unconsciously borrowed. Wahoo reader Don Smith writes that his wife likes to watch and listen to Lou Dobbs on the CNN. She likes to count how many times he says, “point of fact” and “illegal aliens” every night.
Sounds like it has the makings of a good drinking game.
I’m surprised none of the local sports scribes have mentioned this, or if they have, I’ve missed it. In the off-season, the Yankees picked up light-hitting 1st baseman Doug Mientkiewicz. Why? Well, he’s an excellent fielding first baseman, but I suspect they got him because he played on the same high school team as Alex Rodriguez. The Yankees want A-Rod to have a friend nearby in order to make him more comfortable in New York.
I don’t know if this was what the Yankees were thinking or if this will help, but I do have a degree in psychology.
Hotel and Commercial Office Real Estate:
Trump Towers (New York, New Jersey, Chicago, Florida,
Las Vegas, Seoul, Toronto)
Trump Hotels (Las Vegas, New York, Chicago, Toronto,
Panama, Canouan Island)
Trump Casino Resorts:
Trump Taj Mahal (Atlantic City)
Trump Plaza (Atlantic City)
Trump Marina (Atlantic City)
Club Trump Privee (Canouan Island)
And now, a Wahoo Gazette tradition: (Is it a tradition when it’s only the second year?)
In Like A Lion, Out Like A Lamb
by Lorie Hill
March roars in like a lion
So fierce,
The wind so cold,
It seems to pierce.
The month rolls on
And Spring draws near,
And March goes out
Like a lamb so dear.
Next Week’s Previously Viewed Programs: MONDAY:From February 26, 2007; #2713: Stupid Human Tricks; Jake Gyllenhaal; and Brand New. TUESDAY:From February 15, 2007; #2706: Sienna Miller; Nas; and ventriloquist Jim Barber & Seville WEDNESDAY:From March 19, 2007; #2721: Bernie Mac; Paula Abdul; and Joss Stone. THURSDAY:From February 21, 2007; #2710: John Travolta; Eric Nerhus; and “Spring Awakening” FRIDAY:From March 14, 2007; #2720: Richard Gere; Gene Rurka; and Aqualung.
Other Trump Brands:
"The Apprentice"
Trumped! (radio program)
Trump Pageants (including the Miss USA, Miss Teen USA,
and Miss Universe Pageants)
Donald Trump: The Fragrance
Trump Ice (bottled water)
Trump Super Premium Line of Vodka
Trump University (includes Trump University clothing,
software, and CDs)
Trump Mortgage
Trump Magazine
Trump Golf Clubs
Go Trump (online travel Web site)
Trump Model Management
Disposable cameras
Trump furniture line (coming 2007)
Skating rinks
And so ends another issue of the Wahoo Gazette, the world’s longest continuous-running blog on the internet . . . . I think.
CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
From New City, New York and a 1976 graduate of Ramapo High School, it’s Joanne Sullivan!
This concludes another installment of CAMEO MENTION OF A WAHOO READER
ACT 1 • Show Open • Dave's Monologue Watch now • Meet the Press: Neck Waddle of the Night • A Message From Al Gore • Late Show Fun Facts • Great Moments In Presidential Speeches: Education
ACT 2 • Top Ten Features of the One Million Dollar Laptop Read now
